It's going

We've had some struggles and diffculties the past few weeks but things are starting to look up.

I did find my dress but the tiara and veil that went with it would have been about $400. So I wasn't going to get those. I don't think I want a veil anyway but I did find a tiara I love and ordered it today!

Secondly, all our deposits went out on Jan 23 but for some reason my check for the reception site hadn't been cashed in two weeks. I was worried it got lost. Sara said she'd keep an eye out for it and if it got cashed and it wasn't her then we'd have to call my bank. Thankful she got it yesterday and is cashing it today. We'll be signing our contract within the next few days.

Our family is in a major trial. We are asking for prayer for guidance. Our faith in God and His doing is what is keeping us together. Unfortunately I will be losing a bridesmaid and a good friend. I did tell her she is more than welcome to come back but I know it will be difficult and probably won't happen. It's difficult for me too as she has become one of my best friends. I love her very dearly and pray God comforts her.

I have been such a pain about waiting. I think that November is so far away. I don't want to wait! I've been reading some of Elisabeth Eliots books. Passion and Purity was recommended to me (and I recommend it, too, for single girls and those in relationships). Now that I've almost finished that book, I can't complain about waiting anymore. They gave up each other to God completely and began a waiting period 1000s of miles apart. They loved each other beyond a love of lifetime but yet waited on God for His timing. Both felt that they were called to be missionsaries and do His work. Jim felt God calling him to be single and go out onto the mission field. She waited for him. Their love affair was beautiful once it began in God's timing. I'm not a waiter but I can't imagine waiting that long for the one I love!

I also just finished Through the Gates of Splendor, the story of Jim Eliot. Another amazing book. It gripped my heart as the men went into the jungle to never return. Did their wives know? Did they have an idea they would never see them again? How can a wife competely give up her husband to the Lord like that as he walks away from her for the last time? I look at my husband to be and wonder if I could do the same. Could I let him do that? Could I allow him to enter the jungle without ever knowing if he would come back? I pray to God that I could. Both books have changed my perspective on marriage and love. I desire to have a love and marriage in God and God alone.